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Shadows

by Semplica

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1.
being lonely and alone are two different things and it turns out i'm both, so i'm fucked and i've been fooling myself into thinking i'm happy and it's obvious i'm anything but so now i drink to stay warm and fill that space in our bed where i still see you when i close my eyes and i know that i told you that i'd love you forever but you know that'd a goddamn lie and you could call but i know you won't it's all your fault that i feel this way and i tried sleeping it off but my head really hurts and i can't tell if it's the whiskey or her and my mom thinks it's great that i'm writing again and i take that for everything that it's worth but if i could go back, i'd still give it all up thinking i could spend forever with her but forever is bullshit it was all just a lie and love is just a four letter word and you could call but i know you won't it's all your fault that i feel this way
2.
i threw away the sheets to our bed towels and t-shirts and books you read along with the memories i had in my head and i may be broken still but i, i'm not dead i never fought, i just fell in line and me i was miserable most of the time now it's always so dark in the back of my mind where i'm still screaming that i'm fine, i'm fine, i'm fine, i'm fine, i i'm stuck standing still (don't move the ground won't break your fall) out here on my own (don't breathe the are will burn your lungs) take me under now (let go your eyelids start to close) learning how to drown eloise, yeah our love was untrue just a few months on and now you're breathing for two and i hope that you find what it is that you need 'cause now we know that it's not me, oh it's not me, no it's not i'm stuck standing still (don't move the ground won't break your fall) out here on my own (don't breathe the are will burn your lungs) take me under now (let go your eyelids start to close) learning how to drown these nights i lie awake and tally up all of the days when it didn't hurt to breathe when suddenly i realize those days are behind me i'm stuck standing still (don't move the ground won't break your fall) out here on my own (don't breathe the are will burn your lungs) take me under now (let go your eyelids start to close) learning how to drown
3.
i remember a time when i thought i was happy it was with you by my side but i hardly left the house i couldn't bring myself to write hell, i barely even tried we got a dog and hid away insid that big old southern state i tried to welcome on old age and those books you read each one just went right to your head you drifted further with each page and it all turns out it was headed south it was one big fucking lie and it took too long for me to figure out that you weren't the love of my life and i can't hate you, but i'll try so i ran, that's what you get from a broken man but state lines don't give a damn they'll wash you clean put a little life back in your dreams but it's still her face that i see now i talk slow repeating every trick i know i wake up empty from routine and these books i read well, they can't keep me company or talk me down when things get bleak and it all turns out it was headed south it was one big fucking lie and it took too long for me to figure out that you weren't the love of my life and i can't hate you, but i'll try
4.
she says, "i have to let you go." i said, "i know, i know." she said, "it's not the way that it used to be. and that's too hard for me." so i read and i drink and i sing just like it used to be but the truth is it got cold when you walked on out that door you left it open and i don't have a coat she is everywhere and nowhere she is everything and nothing to me and i guess i'm sleeping now but it's mostly on the couch and i'm counting down the days until i leave this fucking house i took your pictures down but you still live in these walls and in that bedroom down the hall where i'm breaking down i'm breaking down she is everywhere and nowhere she is everything and nothing to me peaks and valleys always up and down and i swear to god the only thing that i want now is just to level out find a place where i can lie down and let time wash over me wipe away your memory like i never found out the truth behind your eyes that our love was just a lie you told yourself to sleep at night and now i'm all out and i don't know what to do 'cause i hate myself for knowing that i'm always gonna love you.
5.
Coin-Op TV 02:10
one step at a time i remember to breath my head always works like a coin-op tv on whiskey and wine till i'm feeling alright and i get away from that hell of a night when you kissed me empty and i ran away suppose i was hoping you would give to the chase but i was a fool and you where a child parading through k-town and the miracle mile but i left the light on just in case but that doesn't mean i'll be staying up late again

credits

released June 15, 2018

Music by Doug Orey, Adam J. Hand, and Nick Grieco

Lyrics by Doug Orey

Produced by Adam J. Hand, Doug Orey, and Nick Greico

Recorded and Engineered by Adam J. Hand at The Ark (Boston, MA) & Bigsby’s Kingdom (Boston, MA)

Mixed and Mastered by Adam J. Hand at Bigsby’s Kingdom

Additional vocals on The Sheets To Our Bed performed by Lindsey Starr

Art by Max Lollar

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Semplica Los Angeles, California

Just a few dudes and their friends making music they want to listen to.

LOS | BOS

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